


If You Want Trust, You're Gon' Have to Give Some Away

by SchneiderAlvarez



Category: One Day at a Time (TV 2017)
Genre: Gen, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-12
Updated: 2019-03-12
Packaged: 2019-11-16 00:36:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18083984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SchneiderAlvarez/pseuds/SchneiderAlvarez
Summary: Schneider worked hard to gain the Alvarezes trust, and he can do it again.





	If You Want Trust, You're Gon' Have to Give Some Away

When the kids come back from school and Lydia still isn’t there, Schneider knows he has to do something. Poor Penelope is already at work, worrying about her missing _Mami_ – she doesn’t need to worry about her kids, too.

He greets Alex, Elena, and Carmen as they come in. He puts on his ‘dad voice’ and tells them to go do their homework, or whatever. They don’t take him too seriously, but that’s okay, neither does he. But they are also responsible kids – more props to Penelope – and they know what they should be doing.

It feels weird to be cooking in the Alvarez kitchen all by himself, but it’s nice to feel helpful. It’s not like he’s got anything else going on. He realizes he should give Penelope a call and let her know what’s up.

He half expects her to come rushing home as soon as he tells her that Lydia’s not here. He expects that she’ll want to come take over from him, since what does he know about kids? About responsibility? He doesn’t want that to happen, but he also knows he can’t leave her out of the know.

But she doesn’t rush home. She seems glad that he’s there to watch out for her family while she’s gone. And it makes him happy that she trusts him.

And he knows the kids are pretty old at this point, and don’t really need a babysitter, so it’s not a _huge_ deal. But back in the days of frosted tips and keg stands, a responsible adult like Penelope wouldn’t let him feed her _cat_ , let alone her children. So, if you ask him, this is a step up.

They don’t like his food very much, but he _was_ competing with Lydia’s perfect cooking, so he tries not to let it get to him. Besides, even when Penelope comes home, her mother following not long behind her, he still gets to hang out and eat with them. And it feels a little bit like he’s part of the family. And it’s nice. Really nice.

* * *

 

“ _In the meantime, I’ll take Alex to baseball.”_

He says it, and he means it. Like he always does. But he doesn’t expect Penelope to take him up on it. That’s why he follows it up with a joke.

_“It gives me a reason to break out the athleisure ware.”_

He expects her to roll her eyes and go “uh huh” like she does when he calls himself a _Cubano_ at heart. Or when he calls himself an Alvarez. He always means that too, but he also knows that Penelope doesn’t think of him like that, and that’s okay. He’ll get there.

But that’s the weird thing – this time she actually agrees. More than that, she doesn’t argue in the slightest. Schneider, the landlord, the addict, offered to drive her youngest son to his baseball practice and she totally goes for it. He plays it off like he’s not surprised, but inside he’s beaming.

She really trusts him to do this for her. Penelope, super mom, trusts him to look after her kid.

Nobody ever does that. He knows plenty of people who wouldn’t let him drive them around _now_ , when he’s over five years sober, let alone their kid. He’s always understood why people don’t trust him – he doesn’t trust himself all the time, either. It’s the price he has to pay for all of those years of snorting cocaine in seedy bathrooms to the sound of techno music blasting from the other room. That’s just how it is.

But, maybe not forever. Maybe not with Penelope.

Maybe he isn’t that far off from being an Alvarez after all.

* * *

 

When Alex tells Schneider about Elena possibly being gay, it’s an accident. And he can’t say that Elena is all that thrilled about him knowing. But he knows he can prove himself to her – he can totally be trusted with secrets like that.

It totally kills him inside to not mention it – especially because there are so many great pun opportunities that would totally give her away. But he keeps his mouth shut. He even manages to keep it from Lydia, who’s usually his _chica chismosa_ , because he knows it’s not his place to out her; she needs to choose the time and place for herself.

He’s so relieved when Penelope comes to his door and tells him Elena came out to her. He was so tired of keeping that secret, and now he didn’t have to worry about it anymore.

But on top of that, Penelope trusted _him_ with that secret. She didn’t know that he already knew – but she came to him anyway to get it off her chest. She took a look at the people around her, the people she knew she could count on, and she decided to come to _him_.

He knew it wasn’t the right time to bring it up, but in that moment, he was proud. Proud that he had earned that confidence. Proud that when Penelope had a secret, something she was embarrassed about, she confided in him of all people.

He’s never really had that before. And he’s really glad he has that now.

* * *

 

Penelope has been ‘dating’ Max for a while now, and she still hasn’t told her family. But she’s told him. He’s more than happy to keep her secret.

He’s more than happy to bite his tongue when she introduces Max as Schneider’s sponsor, even though he wasn’t expecting it. It’s what she needs at the moment, and that’s alright with him. Besides, who wouldn’t want people to think they’re friends with _Max_? That guy’s amazing.

He’s even happy to forgive her right away, even after the terrible things she said to him after going off her meds. It’s a hard moment for him, certainly. It hurt to hear those things come out of her mouth, but they’re best friends. He can take it, right?

It’s still painful, though. Is that what she really thinks, deep down? That his problems aren’t real just because he has money? That he had to get hooked on drugs just to make people like him?

Maybe it wouldn’t have hit him so hard if he wasn’t already thinking those things on his own. But for now, he’ll have to trust that it was just the depression talking – that she didn’t mean it.

Or at least, he’ll try to.

* * *

 

Lydia’s unconscious right now and Schneider can barely stand to be in the same room as her. It feels like it’s his own mother, lying motionless in the hospital bed. Maybe it’s even worse.

No, definitely worse.

Lydia was the one to invite him into the family in the first place. He might be best friends with Penelope, he might be Elena’s boss, and Alex’s coach, but none of that would be possible without Lydia.

She came to him in his darkest hour with exactly what he needed to get sober. She invited him into her home and offered him a space to feel safe. She offered him a place at her table, and he accepted it gratefully.

And when Penelope and the kids moved back in, he thought that might be over. But even though they made snarky remarks about how much time he spent at their apartment, and how he must not have anything else going on his life, Lydia didn’t let him go. She kept her door open; she kept her home open. And eventually the rest of them accepted him, too.

Lydia trusted him when he was in no position to be trusted. And she loved him when no one else did. Everything he has today – his sobriety, his family – it was because of her.

He wasn’t a religious man by any means, but he was going to pray for her tonight.

* * *

 

Penelope has been trusting him more and more recently to help her through her anxiety attacks. She always thanks him profusely afterwards, but when he says it’s nothing, he means it.

He might not have anxiety problems, but he knows what it feels like when the world is crashing around you. He knows what it’s like to feel like you’re not good enough, and you never will be. He knows what it’s like to feel completely alone, even when there are people all around you.

So yes, it’s nothing. He will run to her side at a moment’s notice, no matter how far away, if it would make her feel better. If he could convince her – even just for a moment – that she is as perfect as he sees her. That everything was going to be alright.

She trusts him with her deepest secrets, he darkest moments. He doesn’t know why, but he doesn’t question it. He doesn’t ask. He doesn’t know what she sees in him, or what her whole family sees in him. But he’s so grateful that they do.

* * *

 

Trust is built over time. It becomes sturdier and stronger over the years, but that doesn’t mean it can’t ever get knocked down. It doesn’t mean it can’t ever go away.

He broke that trust when he drank and lied about it. He hadn’t just ruined his sobriety, he had ruined his most important relationships. None of the Alvarezes could ever look at him the same. He was sure of that.

And Alex? He’ll probably never forgive him after what happened in the laundry room.

But when Penelope and Lydia came to get him that day, they didn’t turn him away. They didn’t chastise him, and warn him to keep his distance.

They invited him upstairs.

They got him clean clothes, they cleaned him up, they fed him.

Over 20+ years of getting sober, relapsing, getting sober again… he had never had this. This was more than trust, this was… love.

And yeah, Penelope had every right to be mad. But she didn’t have to forgive him. She didn’t have to give him a second chance to earn back that trust. She didn’t have to come with him to his meeting.

And she did, anyway.

He knows he should have gone to her as soon as he even _felt_ like drinking, but he didn’t know how.

Even though she had come to him in need so many times, he didn’t know how to reverse that. He didn’t know how to trust her in the same way she had trusted him. But now he did. He understood, now.

_“I’m not giving up on you. None of us are.”_

He had relapsed before, but this time he had a family to stand behind him.

This time was going to be different.

**Author's Note:**

> Title from "If You Want Love" by NF.
> 
> "If you want love, you gon' have to go through the pain  
> If you want love, you gon' have to learn how to change  
> If you want trust, you gon' have to give some away"


End file.
